For all to see
I'm seeing alot of cases I've mentioned below happen.. right in front of me. And to myself. After a good, nice talk with Alvin. I finally understood... and I feel I should share. You may think you alr know the information I'm about to share. But when you are in tt situation.. did u really react tt way? I know I didn't... It's never too late to start and be a better person. For those smart ones who didn't let your emotions rule ur head.. Kudos to you! There is no pin-pointing to anyone in paticular in this entry. These are juz valuable information I'd like to let all my friends know. You may not think you're doing it.. you might be blinded by your own emotions to know you are actually hurting the pple around you. But trust me.. it happened/happens to the best of us. =)
Before you start getting frustrated - take a deep breath and cool down. By getting frustrated or what we call "pek cek" in hokkien. You are affecting the pple around you to feel the same way you do.
I've got a great example for this. One fine day I was waiting for a cab. I juz so happen to be the first person to reach the road for a cab. But somehow, no cabs were coming this way. The weather is fucking hot. And when I get hot... I get frustrated. And when I saw pple with "no-government-sense" go right in front of me and snatch the empty cab tt was rightfully mine. I got even more frustrated. Then I started to go "tsk" and whine about it to Alvin. I behaved like the very classic irritated lady waiting for cab. Which in turn affected the other about 9 pple behind me to get frustrated too. And then they reacted the human way. Walk away.. in front of me and hopefully get a cab earlier than me. If I didn't get so frustrated and behave tt way... they might not have wanna snatch my cab so fast right? Then I wouldn't affect Alvin to feel "ganjiong". And I wouldn't be in a bad mood myself... Truth is there was nothing I could do about it but wait. Unless I wanna walk outta the park which is a crazy idea. Frustrated or not... I had to wait.
Before you throw little tantrums - think why are you doing it in the first place. Do you have a reason for behaving this way. By showing little tantrums, how does it affect the pple around you. Will they snap at you? Or will they be nice enough to tolerate with it.. and how long can they put up with nonsense like these? There are only 2 kinds of pple who can tolerate behavior like these. One, the pple who truly care, cherish and love you. Hug them, kiss them never let them go! Two, the pple who can't be bothered abt you. Meaning... they don't give a shit and would probably laugh behind you for creating unecessary tension juz so you can get the extra attention.
Before you flare up - Allowing urself to flare up only makes things worse. You have everything to lose and nothing to gain. You shout, scream or even cry. At yourself maybe... even worse at the pple who love you. Imagine how shitty they are feeling when you do tt.. Walk a mile in their shoes... You should understand.
When you're unhappy - Don't keep it to yourself... find a person to talk to. Say you're unhappy with your mum, go find her and tell her why you're unhappy. In a nice way tt is. Don't be rude or sarcastic. Show her respect... not only bcoz she's ur mum. At the end of the conversation, you wanna achieve a common understanding and resolve the issue at hand. Same goes for couples. Always talk it out.. communication is very important. And it takes time and effort. Nobody said it was easy. If you don't resolve the issue at hand and bury it in the ground. The nxt time you quarrel with your other half. The old problem is gonna be dug out and put on the table together with the new problem. And my conclusion = double the shit. Tt is no formula to a successful, loving and growing relationship. Keeping problems to yourself will only cause the snowball effect. The snowball will roll and evantually increase in size. You act like you're okay on the outside, but inside you're snowballing. Your problems are boiling... and finally "ring" you snap they all come out at one shot. How scary is tt?
When you meet a problem - Your first reaction is always to stay calm. Because by fretting and getting all panicky over it.. doesn't solve the problem. What solves the problem is a solution. And you will never be able to come out with one unless you are calm. In most cases if you're all worked up and agitated.. the solutions u come out with are fucked. Trust me. And after u come out with a solution... stop fretting and whining over it. Execute and action. Now tt... works.
One of my favourite phrases - I am but only human. Yes.. you are but only human. There are some problems which are within your capability to solve. There are some which aren't within tt range. Understand tt. If you can help... go ahead. If you can't.. there is no point getting so upset over it. You've done your best and tt's all you need to know.
Bottom line, don't let your emotions get the better of you. It will not help the situation but very possibly worsen it. And it will cloud your better judgement to think rationally. You control your emotions not the other way round. Juz like you walk ur dog, ur dog doesn't walk you. When you allow emotions to rule your head, you alr lost half the battle. I juz love talking to Alvin.. coz everything he says juz makes sense. Juz so u know... he told me all of the above mentioned. Okay.. not all 3/4 of it! Anyway I know what I'm gonna post below super no link But then again.. I have to share la! Lemme "haolian" abit k?! =p
Yes! Alvin aka Mr Wong did this.. in something like 10min. Eh.. I'm a photoshop idiot. So this is really.. something. LoL. Nice? Okay... I'm done "haolianing".. haha. Have a nice day everyone! =D
Before you start getting frustrated - take a deep breath and cool down. By getting frustrated or what we call "pek cek" in hokkien. You are affecting the pple around you to feel the same way you do.
I've got a great example for this. One fine day I was waiting for a cab. I juz so happen to be the first person to reach the road for a cab. But somehow, no cabs were coming this way. The weather is fucking hot. And when I get hot... I get frustrated. And when I saw pple with "no-government-sense" go right in front of me and snatch the empty cab tt was rightfully mine. I got even more frustrated. Then I started to go "tsk" and whine about it to Alvin. I behaved like the very classic irritated lady waiting for cab. Which in turn affected the other about 9 pple behind me to get frustrated too. And then they reacted the human way. Walk away.. in front of me and hopefully get a cab earlier than me. If I didn't get so frustrated and behave tt way... they might not have wanna snatch my cab so fast right? Then I wouldn't affect Alvin to feel "ganjiong". And I wouldn't be in a bad mood myself... Truth is there was nothing I could do about it but wait. Unless I wanna walk outta the park which is a crazy idea. Frustrated or not... I had to wait.
Before you throw little tantrums - think why are you doing it in the first place. Do you have a reason for behaving this way. By showing little tantrums, how does it affect the pple around you. Will they snap at you? Or will they be nice enough to tolerate with it.. and how long can they put up with nonsense like these? There are only 2 kinds of pple who can tolerate behavior like these. One, the pple who truly care, cherish and love you. Hug them, kiss them never let them go! Two, the pple who can't be bothered abt you. Meaning... they don't give a shit and would probably laugh behind you for creating unecessary tension juz so you can get the extra attention.
Before you flare up - Allowing urself to flare up only makes things worse. You have everything to lose and nothing to gain. You shout, scream or even cry. At yourself maybe... even worse at the pple who love you. Imagine how shitty they are feeling when you do tt.. Walk a mile in their shoes... You should understand.
When you're unhappy - Don't keep it to yourself... find a person to talk to. Say you're unhappy with your mum, go find her and tell her why you're unhappy. In a nice way tt is. Don't be rude or sarcastic. Show her respect... not only bcoz she's ur mum. At the end of the conversation, you wanna achieve a common understanding and resolve the issue at hand. Same goes for couples. Always talk it out.. communication is very important. And it takes time and effort. Nobody said it was easy. If you don't resolve the issue at hand and bury it in the ground. The nxt time you quarrel with your other half. The old problem is gonna be dug out and put on the table together with the new problem. And my conclusion = double the shit. Tt is no formula to a successful, loving and growing relationship. Keeping problems to yourself will only cause the snowball effect. The snowball will roll and evantually increase in size. You act like you're okay on the outside, but inside you're snowballing. Your problems are boiling... and finally "ring" you snap they all come out at one shot. How scary is tt?
When you meet a problem - Your first reaction is always to stay calm. Because by fretting and getting all panicky over it.. doesn't solve the problem. What solves the problem is a solution. And you will never be able to come out with one unless you are calm. In most cases if you're all worked up and agitated.. the solutions u come out with are fucked. Trust me. And after u come out with a solution... stop fretting and whining over it. Execute and action. Now tt... works.
One of my favourite phrases - I am but only human. Yes.. you are but only human. There are some problems which are within your capability to solve. There are some which aren't within tt range. Understand tt. If you can help... go ahead. If you can't.. there is no point getting so upset over it. You've done your best and tt's all you need to know.
Bottom line, don't let your emotions get the better of you. It will not help the situation but very possibly worsen it. And it will cloud your better judgement to think rationally. You control your emotions not the other way round. Juz like you walk ur dog, ur dog doesn't walk you. When you allow emotions to rule your head, you alr lost half the battle. I juz love talking to Alvin.. coz everything he says juz makes sense. Juz so u know... he told me all of the above mentioned. Okay.. not all 3/4 of it! Anyway I know what I'm gonna post below super no link But then again.. I have to share la! Lemme "haolian" abit k?! =p
Yes! Alvin aka Mr Wong did this.. in something like 10min. Eh.. I'm a photoshop idiot. So this is really.. something. LoL. Nice? Okay... I'm done "haolianing".. haha. Have a nice day everyone! =D
posted by Natalie at 6:01 AM
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